I take too many pictures. Even though, for reasons I can't explain, my picture always gets deleted or lost, either the computer crashes, the harddrive crashes, they just deletes - every picture we as even a family own, since 2006 and picture from vacations etc, are gone. Every picture. And all of my own från before 2011. Every single one. Makes my heart break, because my pictures means so much to me. Even though alot of them are gone {about 100 000 I've taken? More?}, I have way to many of them from the ones I have now. 

Yesterday I went to my dads and got my harddrive from I had there. A few from 2011 and from summer 2012. It's fucking 28 345 pictures. Only from that time. Insane. And it's not like it's bad blurry ones too, THEY ARE ALL PICTURES I COULD SHOW. I don't know what to do with them.

It's just so many of them!!!!




I have barely shown anything on my blog, which is sad and strange and just weird. I don't even show my art here which is weird too. But it's true. Since I got my iPhone june 2012 I have like 250 pictures a day. A DAY. EVERYDAY. For a year soon. On days where alot happened it can be around 1000. 

"Take your camera wherever you go use it as a visual diary;
          capture photos of obejects, places, people."

The best kind of diary.




Stuff like 100 000 deleted pictures hurt so bloody much. Especially the kind that document your life. That matters. Your work, and all the time, every single stuff filled with happiness, that you gave a part of yourself of, stuff that represent you - all gone. You just have to start over. Again and again. And it just hurts. So much.

(and it's not like I'm stupid and making the same mistake twice, they get deleted different ways every single time. My family and friends can't even understand it. It's like I have a curse or something. It's insane. So weird. And it breaks my heart.) Now I have three harddrives. Not happening ever again. Never. Not a chance.

I'm so happy some are still there, and the ones from this summer and 2011. I thought they were gone but remembered that by some luck the days before my crashed I copied some of the best ones to my dads harddrive. Luck or what? So some of them are still there. Well, 28 000-some-of-them. Imagine all the photographs I've taken... insane.

Here is a little green post. Can't wait 'till summer come.